Saturday, March 12, 2011

Dear Sage,

     Hi sweetheart it's Grandma Liz. I wanted you to know that we haven't forgotten about you, in fact quite the opposite is true, we think about you everyday. Your brothers and sister Jayden talk about you often. You are so loved and missed.
     As you know the family has been through some difficult times lately. I know you were aware of us because I have felt your presence in some of my darkest hours. I could feel you gently urging me to "endure to the end" and to have faith. I promised you that I would live my life so I will be found worthy to be with you again and that's what I'm striving for.
    Your baby sister was born and I believe she talks to you. She will look off into the distance and babble away and then break into giggles. Sometimes she keeps your mommy awake for hours but she doesn't seem to mind because she loves watching her chat and coo at the ceiling. It comforts her because she is certain that Ellie's innocent eyes can see what she can
Ellie and I on her blessing day
     Grandma had a hard time sewing Ellie's blessing gown. I kept thinking about how hard it was to sew your burial clothes. There were touches of Sage green in your clothing so I decided to embroidery flowers down the front of Ellie's gown and add some Sage green leaves in your memory.
     I can't believe that your Angel Day will be here in just 1 short week. I have noticed a shift in the family's mood as the 19th of March approaches. We have become more somber and reflective. Each of us have talked about the last time we saw or held you and we can't help but wonder what it would be like if you were still here.
     Your mom and dad are laughing more and your mommy is starting to feel parts of her "old self" returning. I'm so happy to see this and I know it is in part to your baby Sister Ellie. But I also know that the memory of you and the promise of being with you again keeps her moving forward. 
When I look at your baby sister I am reminded of you.  I think the two of you look alike!
     Little man please know that we are all thinking about you. I know that mommy hasn't written in your blog but that doesn't mean she has forgotten. Somebody very close to her said some very harsh words that made her feel that sharing her feelings about missing you was a bad thing. Don't worry I'm sure she will find her way back. It's all just part of this journey she has been on. Learning to live without you has not been an easy thing to do. I think it was James E. Faust that said something like, "The love of a mother is the closest thing that we can come to on this earth that even begins to compare to the love our Savior has for us." and your mommy definitely loves you.
     I will close for now.  I know you will be with us as we celebrate and remember you on your 2nd Angel Day.  May God continue to watch over and keep you until we meet again.

Missing and Always Loving you,
Grandma Liz


Cheryl said...

Wow--does she resemble Sage! What great pictures to compare their beautiful faces. Thank you so much for posting.

No one can possibly walk in another person's shoes and it really saddens me to think that someone would comment on how we, as grieving parents, talk about our grief, etc. as though somehow we are doing it wrong, or it is a bad thing to express our feelings.

It has been two and a half years since my little one has entered into Heaven and some days it seems as difficult as it was in the beginning to some degree...

I have missed reading your blogs, as you have stopped posting as much. I have never posted a lot and unfortunately haven't been good at updating mine lately.

Praying for peace for you and your family at this difficult time. ((hugs)) to you all.

With Hope,

Sharron said...

I have often thought that Ellie looked like Sage.

These thoughts are so lovely. I have been thinking about him so much lately as well. That was such a precious time to be with your family. I grew so much from the spirit that was with you at the time.

I'm glad that you do feel him near by from time to time. How could any of us doubt the gospel when we feel others from the other side of the veil?

Our love, thoughts and prayers will be with all of you.

Olivia's Mommy said...

What a beautiful post, and shame on the person that made Crystal feel like she can not share her feelings about her loss. I keep your family in my thoughts and prayers!

God Bless,

Courtney AKA Olivia's Mom

Rachel Doyle said...

What a lovely post - I had wondered if something had happened because she hadn't written in a long time. People, even the ones who are close, can be so non-understanding. I wish your family well.

Rachel - Nathan's mom

Anonymous said...

Thank you for posting, I have been wondering if something had happened as we have not heard anything for a long time. Shame on the one to make Crystal feel bad. God is the Judge, keep posting as many have loved on your family and care about you!

peachytiffers said...

What a beautiful post! I would like to think that the person that said something was trying to help or show love but they didn't really think of how someone else might take it. I really love and have learned so much from your family and I appreciate every time that you are willing to share your feelings and testimonies with me. Thank you. Love you.

Johanna S said...

Dear Eldredge family, I know today is the day. I have thought of you multiple times today. I don't know you, but I think I will never forget little Sage. My heart feels heavy for all of you. I hope you are feeling God, hugs, and lots of support today. Gentle hugs from a mama in MA.

Sheryl said...

That was a beautiful post. Shame on the person who made Crystal feel bad for sharing her feelings. I miss her beautiful posts and hope to see her back here posting again soon.

Sheryl - NJ

Kris said...

What beautiful pictures & loving words. I have missed hearing about your family. I know that you've gone through some tough times & I pray for you. Hugs from someone that's thinking of all of you.

Marie said...

I just don't understand how any decent human being could criticize someone for talking about their dead child. Crystal, this blog is the one place where you should be able to talk about Sage as much as you like especially if people around you are getting "sick" of hearing about it (and yes, shame on them. Let's see how they'd handle it if it was their child.)

Royal and Charlee Reidhead said...

I just balled as I read such a neat post I never was blessed with the chance to meet sage but I feel I knew him! I see pictures of him and the first time I saw Ellie in the hospital I thought she looked so much like him! He will be forever missed and Crystal since I have known her has changed so much she is a new person and Sage helps her everyday to stay strong for that is what he would want mommy to do! We love you guys!