Today, October 15, is National SIDS and Infant Loss Awareness day. At 7:00pm, you're invited to light a candle for any one you know who has lost a baby due to miscarriage, stillbirth, SIDS or illness/accident.
Since Sage’s passing I have tried to look for the positive in ALL things. You might wonder what positive things could come out of something so tragic. Well that’s one of the many things my grandson has taught me that positive can be found in all things.
One of those positive things is my new friend Amber Terhune. Amber lives in Nevada and is the mother of five children. She is a Doula and for a long time it was her job to travel throughout Nevada and teach classes on SIDS awareness. Then her fourth child, Arianna, was born 8 weeks early on February 27, 2008, she got to come home from the hospital the day after Easter. Ari lived 10 precious days with her family when she passed of SIDS.
SIDS-Sudden Infant Death Syndrome, SUID-Sudden Unexplained Infant Death, SUDI-Sudden Unexplained Death of an Infant
It really depends on what state/county you live in as to what cause of death they label your baby with but they all mean the same…”We don’t know why your baby died.” So if they don’t know why how can they say if your infant sleeps on their back, sucks a pacifier, and etc… this will prevent SIDS. I wish they would change the wording from SIDS PREVENTION to SIDS PRECAUTIONS. It would alleviate much guilt for these parents and also get the word out that these death’s are UNEXPLAINED. We need more research!
I mentioned that Amber was a trained specialist in SIDS. She feels guilty because she felt if anybody could have “prevented” this it should have been her. But to me Amber is a hero. When a parent loses a child to SIDS they research everything they can about SIDS and SIDS “Prevention” and they feel guilty because there might be that one thing they didn’t do. Like how do you keep an 8 month old on their back all night long? For us that “one thing” was having a blanket in bed with Sage. Even though his death was not ruled a suffocation we know the blanket played a part in his death. Most of us put a blanket over our babies to keep them warm I put a blanket in bed with all 6 of my kids. Amber was trained, she taught hundreds, she did everything right and yet it still happened to her. Amber’s story gives all of us strength and bears testimony that it can happen to ANYBODY! I’m sure she would rather not be this type of spokesperson but for what ever reason she is.
Remember those “Positives” I talked about…Amber is one of mine..she doesn’t know this but one night when I couldn’t cry anymore I got up and went to my computer and she Instant Messaged me and we talked for a couple of hours. She got me through a difficult moment.
Amber’s story doesn’t end there. Shortly after her Ari passed away she learned she was pregnant on the SAME day she found out she was pregnant with Ari and she was due the same day Ari was due had she not been born 8 weeks early. Then it get’s stranger. Her little boy ZION was also born eight weeks early…you guessed it…he was born on February 27, 2009…on Ari’s first birthday. What are the odd’s? Little Zion has had some breathing episodes of his own. One day Amber found him not breathing. Thankfully she was able to revive him. Zion is now on a monitor. I can’t imagine the fear she lives with everyday.
Zion is the bottom right and Arianna is top left. Please keep little Zion and Amber in your prayers.
Amber made the following slide show. They are all pictures of Angel Babies most of whom are victims of SIDS/SUID/SUDI. The last photo is of our little Sage. Sadly I recognize many of the babies in this slide show. Their parents have been a source of strength and comfort. Thank you Amber for doing this and for including Sage in your slide show thank you for honoring him in such a way.
At 7:00pm, you're invited to light a candle for any one you know who has lost a baby due to miscarriage, stillbirth, SIDS or accident/illness.
Perhaps you know of a child who is ill? Light a candle for him/her…I will be lighting a candle for my Great Nephew Cole Claridge, whom was recently diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis, and of course one for Sage and all the angel babies.
Scroll down to the bottom of Sage’s blog and pause his music before watching the video. You will want to hear the music on the slide show.
4 comments:
I will definitely light a candle. Thank you for your positive way in sharing your journey through such a difficult time. I learn many things from your writing. Thank you.
As usual, I am in tears, for your family and for all the other parents/grandparents out there who lost a precious little one. My little one's name is Arianna. I won't ever forget little Sage and Arianna's stories. Lots of hugs to your family.
I'm glad you have been able to be there for Amber threw her time of need. I hate that so many children are dieing in their sleep and no one knows why. SIDS is a horrible horrible thing.
Thank you Liz. I was reading this post and Cole started crying. Not just whining but couldn't catch his breath he was crying so hard so I ran in the other room to see what was wrong. I picked him up and I was crying and I said, "sage calm down" then realized it was Cole. It was so weird. I worry every time he sleeps he's going to stop breathing and I just pray he'll be ok. Thank you for keeping us in your thoughts and prayers. We appreciate it and feel comfort from it.
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